Choices in Life: What Do You Make Of Them?

One day in the past I believed that things would stay that way forever. I didn’t think about 33, because I was 23 with all the time in the world ahead of me. I’d travel, I’d have babies, I’d work and write and resell and have animals to care for and the house and land I wanted and everything would just work out. (And I’m by no means saying that it hasn’t). However, as I laid here today staring at the sky, I noticed one significant change from year 23 to year 33…that time has gone exceptionally faster than I could ever think.

Time Is a Fickle Force

Time is a fickle bish. It’s the one thing in the whole wide universe that we can’t ever get even a little bit of back. It’s there and gone in literally each blink of an eye, and it doesn’t ever give us a break otherwise. I thought about how as much as I wanted to turn it back a few times just to adjust a few things, I couldn’t. What’s here and done has been done, and there’s nothing you can do to change it…right?

You Can’t Chase Time, But You Can Choose

Here’s where I feel differently.
Of course, you can chase time as much as you want, but you’ll never get it back the way you want it or the way you found it. It grows faster each year that passes by, and before you know it you’re realizing that urgency is more of a matter in your life…which is something you never even considered before.

The best part about being human though? We have the unique ability to create choices in this life. Yes, we can travel and write and do fun things and take care of our tiny humans and furbabies. Or, we can choose to grind at work day in and day out so we have a leg up on the rest of the world when we retire (if that ever even happens).

Most often, I see that the people working the longest hours, taking on the extra shifts and overtime when it’s available, are the ones who have the most regrets later in life. They wish they’d have done more and worked less, spent more time with loved ones or traveling the world instead of getting those 2 extra hours in at their day job in a stuffy office with no windows or crappy lighting.

But the fact of the matter is, that we always have a choice to make. It’s all in one’s mindset. It may seem so cliche to say, but it is as real as the breath coming from your body right now. Choosing your next great adventure or your next anxiety attack is as easy as making your next decision.

Which road will be the one that you take?

Looking Back at 23: Then vs. Now

23 feels like an entire lifetime ago at this point. It’s been one whole decade since then, and I feel like an entirely different person. Weird, isn’t it? From 13 to 23, you don’t really feel all that much different. Your life is filled with little to no work, (at least none all that meaningful if so), lots of friends and most likely a lot of school and homework. It has (what you think) are giant ups and downs when it comes to friendships or relationships, but little do you understand at that point that things are only just getting started.

Even though at that point you’re beginning to form your own personality, I challenge you to think back to then and realize how much different you have become in your 30s, 40s, 50s, etc. I’m willing to bet that your personality may have even shifted significantly again into actual “adulthood,” which is exactly where I’m at right now.

I'm Scared to be a Parent book by Shelby Rearick — Check out my book The “Shit, I’m Scared to be a Parent” Book

Letting Go of Who You Were

Although I felt at one point that I was losing myself, I now look back and realize that I only was just starting to let parts of me go that were no longer serving my path in life. I was on a different road with a different purpose and the training wheels had finally started to wiggle loose.

After I learned more about who I was becoming, I also recognized the need for self-care. It is so much more important than this world lets on, and I’m hopeful that one day they will teach more of it during our upbringing in schools as well. Even though it is much more prevalent than when I was a child, I feel as though we have many miles to go before understanding how to be our best and most authentic selves.

Someone mentioned today that each day, they wake up, thinking they have a choice. Knowing that they need to rise from their bed, put on a uniform that they didn’t even pick, that probably isn’t all that comfortable, drive at an hour they didn’t want to be up yet at, to a mediocre job that pays their bills. And then they said, “But I know I don’t!” (have a choice, that is)

This whole statement just depleted me, mentally, energetically, and emotionally.
Let me tell you why.

You Have the Power to Choose in Life — Even Now

Guys and gals of the universe out there reading this right now. Allow me to remind you of something.

We have but one life (that we know of) to live on this incredible planet, and as we’ve previously noticed, time does not stand still for anyone. It is up to you to determine how you want to live your own life, and if not everyone around you feels the same, THAT IS OKAY.

In a few years from now, you may not even know them. A few decades from now, their names and faces may fade as well. In a hundred years, no one will even remember your existence (or theirs) perhaps except for their immediate family members.

Make choices that you want to make. Make decisions that shape the way forward to the path you would love most to be on. Stop agreeing to be agreeable. Say no to silly requests and mundane conversations that drain your energy—use it instead for things that truly matter.

Listen more carefully and approach responses with less haste.

It’s important to work on becoming a better partner, friend, parent or spouse. But it’s also important to remember that no one really cares as much about what you want other than yourself. So isn’t it time that yourself is the one that started making the choices that choose freedom and happiness instead of angst and agony? Isn’t it time that you are the one that became in charge of your future?

I understand that often times our hang up is on feeling stuck. We feel like we have to make certain decisions because of others having a grip over us or financials closing in on us from every corner. We say yes without thinking about what we’re losing from saying no, or agree to situations that may make us uncomfortable instead of being authentic and letting others know that we really don’t like something (or them) in the first place.

Choices are being made for you every single day. Begin making your own from this day forward (even for the smallest things), and keep a close watch on how many more blessings you’ll receive once you embrace the future that was meant for you.

Thank You For Reading “Choices in Life: What Do You Make Of Them?

If you made it this far, I just want to say how truly grateful I am that you shared a few minutes of your time with me to read today’s post about choices in life and time. Time is precious (we’ve covered that), and the fact that you spent some of yours here means more than you probably realize. I hope something in these words helped you feel seen, a little less alone, or maybe even inspired to take a new step in your own story. You deserve a life that feels like your own. Choose it, every chance you get.