Years ago I thought I was ready for children. I was going to have 4, maybe 5 and it was going to be freaking GREAT. I “knew” I’d be an awesome mom because well, everyone around me was so sure of it, of course! Funny that most of those people are no longer in my life…it’s as if they really didn’t know me that well after all. Have you experienced this sense of imposter syndrome? Were you ever afraid of what becoming a parent took or knowing that you were “ready?” I’d like to talk about this topic more in depth today and show you that feeling weird about preparing for parenthood is scary shit, and that shouldn’t be frowned upon.

Where I am on the Journey to Parenthood

I mean, listen. Becoming a mother is something I’m over the moon about. I know it’s going to be awesome and epic and I’m going to enjoy more of it than I think I will. It’s not all about wiping butts after all, there’s a lot of other amazing things along the way that I’ll have the opportunity to experience.

But parental anxiety is a REAL thing. And it’s more common than we’d like to believe. Unfortunately the impact it creates for our decision making, the new financial burden hanging over our heads, and the stress that comes with worrying about whether the pregnancy will be alright, let alone the REST OF ITS LIFE.

I get where these fears come from, they’re real, and things go unplanned every single day. Shit happens, but shit, that’s why it’s scary to become a parent!

It’s hard enough to try and get through the speed bumps of your own life, let alone raise a tiny human. Creating a life is hard enough and keeping that little nugget in check is going to be even harder.

However, I’m learning day by day to let go of my past self and embrace my future being. I’m finding new ways to focus on what matters most in my life and let go of the things that cause my stress and unease. It’s time we start looking for ways to enjoy the beauty of life instead of just getting through each hour by staring at the clock.

Related: Reigniting The Feeling: Visiting Your Previous Self & Understanding What’s Changed

 

I challenge you.

I challenge you to pull into your driveway after work, (or walk to your front door if you take a bus or walk to work!), and just stand there. Holding your lunchbox, your purse, briefcase or backpack. Simply stand there and listen.

 

Listen to the birds chirping, the wind blowing, listen to nature. Forget about the cars speeding by, or the people talking loudly, let it all fade away into the sounds of the surroundings that exist when you’re not there.

 

Then, close your eyes and focus on your own breathing. (Stop thinking about what people passing are going to think of you, they’d be jealous if they knew how relaxed you’ll be once you’re done with this weird assignment).

 

Enjoy just being present in that moment. No more work for the day to be done, no more people to answer to on the interweb. Just you, the birds, and the nature around you. Hear the silence among the bustle. Breathe it in peeps, because this is what really matters to provide peace in your life.

 

If you’re anything like me at this stage in life, you’ll know that I’m doing my best to make efforts to grow in both mindset and spirituality. I’m constantly working on what I can do to have less decision fatigue, drive better moods each day, and be more present in my relationship with my spouse.

We focus on traveling more, experiencing more, and doing less things that cause stress. Things like saying yes to things we would really rather say no to, things like avoiding additional triggers such as alcohol, too much caffeine or regularly eating unhealthy foods.

And do you know what? By implementing these things into our daily lives together, we’ve been able to cross new boundaries that I truly don’t believe would have been possible before. Because with each new challenge accepted, and each new problem to solve, we continue to work better together to solve or overcome it.

 

That’s why it’s clear to me now that my overthinking has done nothing but simply cloud my thoughts about signing up for parenthood.

Preparing for What Comes Next

Which leads me to speaking directly on the subject of what comes next.

What steps are you taking in your life to stay on course? Or hell, maybe you want to go off course instead! There’s nothing wrong with enjoying the journey you’re on.

 

I’ve mentioned on the blog how I’m so freaking excited to hike to Havasupai Falls this April. (Don’t forget to come back shortly after to hear all about some juicy tips and tricks to backpacking there!) But when we return, we’ll be using my fancy-dancy Oura Ring to take advantage of those ovulation days, instead of avoiding the red days.

 

No longer will I be tracking my cycle to look for green days, but actively trying to conceive instead. That’s correct, we are venturing ourselves into the long road of preparing for parenthood, and I’ve been trying like hell to not worry about every single little thing that comes with it.

I’ve had many sleepless nights since deciding this, but I’ve also had a plethora of epiphanies as well. You see, parenthood and/or motherhood doesn’t have to be as scary as we make it out to be. It can be simple, relaxed, and adventurous. It can be beautiful, amazing, and perfect in its own way. It’s up to us to decide how we want to raise our children and how to maintain practicing self-care along the way.

 

But don’t worry, cause I still got you boo.

Breaking Through The Pressure Of Society’s Expectations

During these next steps of life, nothing with Habitual Balance is going to change, in fact, I’ll be writing even more tips about how we’re handling pregnancy, early parenthood, and what we’ve figured out works best for us so that I can then present those easy-to-use tidbits for you as well.

 

Expect checklists, encouragement, and oh yeah, I wrote a book all about how scary parenthood seems at this point in time, so if you’re thinking about one day joining that group of us old*er* peeps, go ahead and check it out. And guess what? Not only will you have good old HB to rely on for those checklists and tips, but you’ll also get more books in the series along the way to provide you with some good old fashioned humor as well while you are preparing for parenthood.

 

As always my friends, thank you for your support in this weird journey called life. Us humans in the same mindset have to stick together out here, because no one is coming to save us! Except maybe your best self, lurking in the darkness just waiting for you to show them the light.

 

Later gator.