Hey you fabulous person you. Go ahead, pat yourself on the back because only you can fix your uncomfy situation, and by being here, with a like-minded person going through the same things, is step one. For reals friend, you’ve already recognized that your situation is less than ideal, so you went searching on the web to find someone going through the same things. That’s where I come in! Your bff from afar, I’m here to support you along the weird and winding way. Whatever it is that you’re going through, just remember that you are in control of your outcomes.  Here are 5 reasons why being your own best friend is so important.

 

 

Balancing Flow Vs. Control

You may be like, but Shelby, you’re sounding hella contradictive from last post, that talked all about how we need to let go more often and enjoy the flow of life more frequently. How we can thrive from not over planning and overthinking about each and every last detail.

And that’s totally true.

BUT.

YOU ARE IN CONTROL of what decisions you make along this flow of life, and where you end up in your future. So, let’s talk about becoming more balanced in our habits regarding control vs. the flow.

First of all, let me preface this by stating that it’s taken me *literal years* to understand that me, myself and I can make shit happen. And sometimes, that shit can be scary…

But the best part about the scary parts is that we get to work through them. We get to understand the conflict and rise up on the other side. We get to realize our true potential and learn how to knock down barriers along the way.

If you can start replacing that one little word, trust me it’ll make a world of difference.

But besides that, I want you to recognize that barriers take time to build up, which also means that they’re going to take time to tear down. So don’t get discouraged, because I’ve got your back.

 

 

Hey Friend, Start Putting Yourself First

We talked in the last post about how life doesn’t always seem to hit perfectly every time. And although I do feel I’m on the right track to my life-lasting happiness, no one can ever understand what it is that actually gets us there.

We may think that we need to have these grand plans and giant steps in the business world or with our families to check into the next level up. That we have to “have it all figured out” by the time we’re 30, and in the process make sure that said families don’t hate us or want to disown us for embracing different beliefs as we grow into our own new person.

But you see, that’s not true at all.

The more we grow and learn and acquire throughout life, the more we can interpret it into our own little unique situations. Which in turn, allows us to apply those new found tidbits into daily life and continue creating the best lifestyle we know we can accomplish.

I want to inspire anyone reading this to start putting themselves first. Now I’d like to consider myself an empathetic person because I literally feel bad for every single thing, bug, plant, and human being on this planet. It’s sort of annoying at times.

But guess what? As they say, no one’s coming to save you. And therefore, you my friend, need to save yourself.

Related:  Learning To Walk Through Struggle: Realizing My Journey Is My Own

5 Tips For Being Your Own Best Friend

So, how do we go about all this lah-dee-dah-dee self-saving?

Check out this handy-dandy list. It’ll get things started.

1. Allow love in. This was a hard one for me. It seems so simple, right? But for a long time I (didn’t even realize) that I had a huge ugly wall up that was causing me to lash out at people I cared about. It was very uncool, but once I understood that to love myself more I needed to allow more love in from others, my life began to shift into more smiles and less RBF.
2. Find your most authentic self, and love the shit out of them. Correct, similar to the first point, you have to surround yourself with people who love you for who you actually are, because if you don’t, you’ll likely be googling “what is imposter syndrome” in 20 years. Just be you, mmkay?
3. Create “me time…” and STOP feeling guilty about it. Why is it that we harp on ourselves when things pop up that actually require some space? Why is it that we feel bad about carving out any tiny moment for making our hearts happy? Can we stop labeling “me time” as faulty time management and start embracing the extra minutes in the day doing something that we love, just for fun?
4. Keep reminders, like, of everything. Guys, I’m sure we all probably have a love/hate relationship with AI and Alexa and Siri and Google Assistant and Chatgpt…BUT. Hear me out. Let’s begin to beat the haters at their own game by being on top of ours. Instead of being late to meetings, write them DOWNNNN girl. Instead of being late to an appointment, add them to your calendar right away and even go as far as including the location so all you have to do is click on your GPS. Start putting yourself first and making sure you have time to prepare even for the most mundane of tasks. At the end of the day, you’ll feel refreshed and less stressed knowing that you didn’t have to rush that day or miss something of importance. Because YOU have got your own back. BOOM. 😎
5. “No” is a complete sentence. An oldy, but goody. We’ve heard it, probably said it to others jokingly, and maybe even used the phrase to make fun in a conversation. But I’m serious, friends! I just used it the other day. I don’t remember what for, but that’s the beauty of it. It can literally be used for any circumstance, and in a perfect world, there really should be no questions asked. If it’s not a HECK YES, then stop feeling bad about saying NO. <3

 

Maybe This Is Your Time Now

I used to give myself flack for not being more on the bandwagon by now with working out and eating right. And although I didn’t initially plan to workout today, I took what clothes I had on my back and decided to go run at the gym.

While I was running, I realized that perhaps I’m exactly where I need to be. At the right time, in the right place, and in the right mindset. FINALLY. (maybe not the right clothes, but hey, we made them work)…check out the going with the flow mindset. Eh?

What I’m trying to say is that things take time. Like, SO much time that it starts to pain you a bit. But keep pushing a little more each day. Keep learning about who you really are and what your own blockers are.

What I concluded on the treadmill was that perhaps alcohol was my blocker. Maybe I used that for so long to “escape” both external and internal work that I didn’t want to face that it was actually in turn, blocking my ability to become a more emotionally mature person. Maybe I needed to recognize that I wanted to stop drinking. And only then, did I start to be forced to have to confront my life activities, functions, events, etc. without being clouded. I learned who I actually am as a human being.

Since then, I’ve become a little bit better in my nutrition, a little bit better in my work ethic, and a little bit better in my workout routines, because no longer is something blocking my way forward.

So I say again, whatever it is that you may be working toward or traveling through, keep pushing. Nothing is more important than your mental health, because when you start treating yourself like the best friend you never had, you’ll start to speak more clearly to yourself about who you want to become.

 

 

Did You Enjoy “Here’s 5 Reasons Why You Need To Be Your Own Best Friend”?

Thank you for reading today’s post about the 5 reasons you need to be your own best friend.  Speaking of friends… follow Habitual Balance on Instagram.  Until next time.