5 Steps To Achieving Your 2024 Goals and How I’m Planning Mine
Hello again, friend! As the first month of 2024 quickly comes to a close, there are many things that still need accomplished in the remaining 11. Come along with me today and chat with me about what my goals and plans are and learn how I’m realizing what works best to get those goals actually accomplished. Here are 5 steps to achieving your 2024 goals. Step 1: Set Your Goals for 2024 Do you have goals for this year? Do they have deadlines or due dates? If you’re like most of the world, (myself included!), that’s most likely going to be a big YES! Goals help us stay focused on the end point of our planning. They help us to realize that there is in fact a finish line. That sometimes we just have to stay the course to get to the main prize. During the year of 2024, I have several goals I’ll be setting out to accomplish. What are your 2024 goals? 2023 was a long year for me. It was a year of odd jobs, new beginnings, a few endings and a lot of lessons learned. Which means in 2024, I’m more than ready to start living my best life at the young age of 32, and I’d like for you to join me on that journey. What do you say? Let’s start achieving those 2024 goals. Related: Moving Ahead And Appreciating The Now Step 2: Determine Your Top 3 Goals for 2024 If I could describe last year in one phrase or word, it would be “scatter-brained.” Do you have a word that comes to mind when considering the past 12 months? If you’re unhappy with last year’s accomplishments, I’m here to tell you that we have a fresh start. And maybe, find yourself a new word to live this year by! (I’ll list a few suggestions) Growth Flow Patience Now, jot down your 3 most important goals. Let’s do this together, shall we? I’ll start. Grow a full indoor garden by revamping my empty office space Become eligible to compete in a BJJ competition Travel at least 3 times to another state with my husband These are all giant goals. They take a lot of planning, plus hefty investments of both time and money. Which also takes into account a savings goal, to ensure they can all actually pan out. If you’re into fitness and self-care, here’s something that may surprise you about self-growth. Discovering that importance (on your own) is harder than you may think. Once I took a hiatus from my trainer at the end of last year, I gave myself a 3 month goal post to hit to return back to their expertise. Changing Habits Requires Accountability However, I realized as the days and weeks passed on, that my personal habits are much harder to change that I’d originally considered. I felt the pull of needing to do things on my own accord, by not having someone holding me accountable each week for new routines. I’m nearing the 3 month mark now. But at about month 2, I came to realize that this was going to be more like a 6 month or longer journey instead. You see, as we obtain workout partners, or trainers, or nutrition experts (I did this as well), we start to let go of the control we have over own our actions. We start to rely on these external sources for committing to a goal and for praise after having done a good job. It was only after gaining more time back in my life after quitting these external commitments that I realized I was hardly spending any time on myself at all. I got up, did what I was supposed to do, and went to bed. Whether that be professionally or personally. Once the hours started becoming open again, I found that I can be much more focused to improving my lifestyle all by myself. Are you ready to do the same? Step 3: Determine What’s Important for You By finally committing to myself and creating an actual self-care routine, I’m starting to have more and more success day after day on eating better for my mind and body, choosing a good book over YouTube shorts, and gaining steps towards my 3 main goals. This all required mental clarity which is something I’d have never realized if it wasn’t for taking a step back and actually opening up some much needed brain space. Do you actually need all of those fitness classes? Or the social apps on your phone? How about shopping at the premium stores when a local market could get you the same items for half the cost? Are you still concerned about your status or how others around perceive you? My plan this year is to focus less on others and more on myself. So far, I’d say I’m doing okay. How are you doing? I’m not one to keep a journal nearby, unless it’s to dump my thoughts in the early mornings or during dreams at night. So therefore, calendars and notebook planners just don’t work for me, and I’m starting to realize that I’m not the only one struggling with setting a core schedule or sticking to my plan. Related: To Conquer Your Goals in 2024, You’ll Need To Become Your Own Teacher Step 4: It’s Okay to be Scared, Keep Going Recently, a plan formed all on its own though. Which has forced me into recognizing these goals more and really shooting for success before this plan is upon us. Quick side note: We traveled a few years ago to Arizona and Utah and absolutely fell in love. We’ve (the hubs and I), have been pining to go back ever since. Which is why I’m so excited to announce these new plans that are in our near future. An email came through last week regarding two permits obtained. One, to tent camp at the base of the Grand Canyon, and Two,
To Conquer Your Goals in 2024, You’ll Need To Become Your Own Teacher
Goals. That’s what this month is all about, right? Goals to do better in the physical health world mostly, goals to excel in your studies or career, and goals to just be an all around better person in life. This isn’t something that was hard-wired in my brain growing up, it was there, buried way in the back, just waiting to be unleashed. What do your goals look like for the new year? Did you make a list and check it twice? Let’s take a look at why you’ll need to become your own teacher to conquer your goals in 2024. Goals, Goals, Goals in 2024 Once upon a time goals were nonexistent. As a child, you live a lot of your life day to day and look forward only to what’s for dinner and at who’s house your next sleepover will be. I’m looking forward to setting more goals in my life these days, and here’s why you should consider it, too. Have you ever thought that a goal was unreachable, only to succeed far past yours and others expectations? I can’t say this has happened all the time, but it is something that I’ve known others to do and myself from time to time, as well. Many years have gone by with goals achieved and goals missed, but this year hits differently. This year is going to be for you, for me, and for all the other souls out there striving for a better mindset. Today, there are more than enough articles, podcasts, channels and blog posts filled to the brim with helpful information showing us the best and most certain ways to achieve said goals, however…most of us simply just watch them. Once you watch and listen, do you implement them? Do you set out to conquer those new goals or do you just push past them and schedule them once more for the next January to come? Reality check friends, that January is here once again. Related: Habitual Growth: Looking Back And Moving Forward How to Create a Goals List I’ve gathered my thoughts and a few notes on the matter of today’s post, so that we can glue these pieces together and find out what parts are worth lingering on and which can be tossed away. Let me know what your thoughts are about them in the comment section, and feel free to share any tips of your own! How to Create a Goals List: Write them all down. Yes, all of them. Find your top three and move the others to another section or another piece of paper to remind yourself of them later. (Only add them to your original piece when you feel it’s the right time). Take the top choice of your top three and begin challenging yourself to achieve it. Bonus tip! Write down beside each goal how much time you think each should take to conquer, goal posts are necessary in achieving larger goals. How to Conquer Your First Goal: Vanquish any doubt that you won’t achieve said goal. Vanquish those doubts again…trust me, they’ll return. Take the first steps in achieving that goal, and write out each step completed on a third piece of paper. (Invest in a pretty notepad if you get motivated by those things…speaking from experience of course). Finally, How to Achieve Your Remaining Goals: Take one step at a time. Rome wasn’t conquered in a day and girl, we’ve got bigger problems than Rome. Check those boxes. Release those endorphins and get excited. You’re doing this. Keep that paper with you at all times. Check back when you feel down and reinvent yourself when necessary to accomplish them. Keep it simple, sweet, and easy to remember. Related: Moving Ahead And Appreciating The Now Goals Remind Us of Who We Want to Be These goals may take minutes or maybe years, but all the while, I urge you to keep them with you. If you don’t have a pocket then carry them in a purse or a bag. Find a safe space for them and make several copies if you choose. Laminate them, embrace them, believe in them. When we have goals that stare back at us, we are faced with a constant reminder of what it is that we’re searching for. Is it love? Money? Is it a little bit of both? Perhaps it traveling more often or adopting all the pets. It could even be as big as saving up to afford the house of your dreams or marry the love of your life. Or, it could be as simple as getting out of bed today. (This is a hard one for heavy sleepers like myself). Replace your goals as you cross them off. But! Keep your same sheet. Continue to write #4, #5, and so on, so that you are consistently reminded of how far you’ve come each time you look at that notepad and how many goals you’ve already crushed. I’ve tried several different approaches at figuring out why I would get stuck in completing my own goals throughout the years. Whether it be procrastination, annoyance, or impatience, one thing stuck. Even though goals of ours may change, completing them shouldn’t. If you feel as though you need to alter a goal in time, then do it. It’s your list and your very own master class. Now it’s up to you to be the best teacher. Thank You For Reading “To Conquer Your Goals in 2024, You’ll Need to Become Your Own Teacher” Thank you for reading today’s post about how to conquer your goals in 2024. What has your path looked like? Let me know what resonates with you. If you have a suggestion for our next post, let us know. Don’t forget to check out our sister site Rooted Drawers.
Working From Home And How It Has Molded Me
Once in a while we get blessed with an “Aha” moment. Those moments can be big or small, mind-blowing or just a newly discovered thought. Working from home off and on the last few years has been a journey to say the least. It’s pushed me to new levels of being, helped me to understand more issues about myself that I didn’t even know existed, and showed me that sometimes, you just have to fail a bunch to understand that you are staying true to your individual course. My Journey To Today Nearly 11 years ago I met my husband. I was waiting tables on the late shift when the man of my dreams walked in and sent chills and butterflies throughout me all at once. It was a feeling I never knew before, and if you’ve had them, you totally understand. At that point, I had no goals, no real ambitions, and no feelings on how I would be spending my next years let alone my next days. I was living for the moment, enjoying the spontaneous, and not caring much at all about my health, let alone my life ahead. This month at Habitual Balance, we’re looking back. After looking back a lot at this year in the last few posts, I’d like to go way back and travel with you on my journey to becoming a full-time reseller and blogger writing to you today snuggled on my couch with my two poofballs curled up next to me. Life has changed a lot since then, but alas, so have I. Related: How Self Reflection Helps You Grow as a Person A Little Bit About Me When I say that I’m not an emotional person, I have to explain it a little more. Death doesn’t phase me much anymore, and sadness comes in many different forms. However, when I sit back and think about where I was in my life during our initial meet, and where I am now, tears pool in my eyes…I should probably invest in some teeny tiny umbrellas. They’re not tears of sadness, but not all of happiness either. They’re more of a disbelief that life has led me to this point in such a weird and winding way, and I’m just overwhelmingly grateful for that. Once I met my partner in this life, I realized a few things. I’d need to focus more on my well-being, understand who he was, and learn how to become better together as the years flew by. Working from home was never on my to-do list, I didn’t even know at that point that it was a thing, let alone going to be what I did primarily in my future years, and mainly because of the fact that I wanted to do all I could to find something that would allow me to continue providing as a part of my family during and after my childbearing years. I longed to stay home with my pets, and in the future, our kids. So, after a bunch trial and error, I finally figured out something that I could make work. It felt incredibly refreshing. Reselling And Blogging – Working From Home I grew up selling things. Anything and everything that I could get my tiny entrepreneurial hands on. I wanted to make ends meet before I knew what it meant. Give me a plastic cash register and I’ll give you my business plan. Once sailing through 20-30 dead end jobs, it struck me that one thing remained obvious throughout them all. I was bored. I’d start every job, every career, (including my career as a 2x college dropout), elated and prepared af. Then, a few weeks would turn into months, and before the years end I’d always make a run for the next opportunity ahead of me. This got old after awhile, causing me to grow more bored, and in turn, burnout from misunderstanding what was staring me in the face. I would be respectful to my employers, but would grow irritable on the way home knowing that I could offer so much more than I was. The “Aha” moments started to come one after another, far spread throughout years but finally after several ideas failed, one ultimately stuck. Reselling became my thing, and blogging was where I grew fond of writing once again, just as I did as a child. Once I had dealt with family members passing, a sick pup and heartbreak of many forms, there was one consistent thing that remained at the top of my thoughts each one of those nights as I lay awake staring at the ceiling. “Thank God I work from home.” Related: Path To Productivity: My Struggle With Planning And The Perfect Hot Cocoa Recipe Working From Home Benefits If I never had the opportunity of doing so, with the help of my husband working alongside me to build my dreams, I may not have gotten to be with my loved ones in their last days, or take care of my dog when he needed me most. I may not have been able to grind all day and all night on my business, so that my dreams that are still unfolding could ultimately be fulfilled. I also may not have began to understand mental health and how important it is to us all. How our physical and mental strength play off of one another, and I may not have had time to read about, listen to, and learn of the ways that I can improve all of these things before becoming ready to welcome another life into the world. Working from home has many ups and downs, although many think there are solely ups. I’m here to confirm that I’ve been through a lot of both, and although there are days where I still get frustrated at my employer (lol), I bring myself back to reality by reminding myself that through this all remains the fact that I get to work for myself. What
Moving Ahead And Appreciating The Now
We talked a little so far in December about how to stay more present within the tasks you’re focusing on and why that gratitude should be taken a little less for granted. Today I’d like to chat with you about moving ahead in the new year and how I’ve been focusing more on “appreciating the now” lately. Understanding Stressors And How To Avoid Them It’s hard sometimes to understand where to draw the line. When do you start putting play first and work second? I feel like this is something we likely all struggle with, so let’s talk about that a little bit today. This month I’ve been doing exactly the opposite of last year. This quarter, actually. From Fall on, I’ve been focusing more on my mental and physical setbacks that are holding me up, why they are (or were) happening, and how I can conquer them just a smidge better in the first quarter of 2024. The last quarter of the year always starts a hustle and bustle of family get togethers, birthdays, anniversaries, events, games, vacations (or the lack of), and work…a LOT of it. You could say that last year I held about one ounce of what I do this year for personal time or time with my significant other. It really sucked to say the least, and in January I felt all of the effects of burnout at once. This year I’ve been taking more time to understand stressors, how to navigate them more appropriately, and what I can do to avoid them or move through them instead of letting them control me and/or my behaviors. Have you ever felt like this? That you were basically in the passengers seat just struggling to stay on the ride? Related: How Self Reflection Helps You Grow as a Person Find Your Spot Today I’m writing to you from an old refinished whiskey distillery. It’s located in the bottom half section of a now-usable horse barn, where the horses and foals are sitting right outside the window waiting for pets. (Yes, of course I petted them! Don’t worry, this was 100% allowed by the Airbnb owners!) It sits on a beautiful piece of land that has immaculate sunsets and sunrises. The cooler air means one thing, more comfy clothes, space heaters, dark wine and hot cocoa. It’s like roughing it in luxury. There’s the original barn doors, the same beams on the bed that the barn was built with in the 1800s, but also, a towel warmer. (Yes, really!) My favorite spot has to be the cute little wooden nook in the corner behind the bed. It’s the perfect setting for when I’m inspired to write, being that I get distracted easily and there is nothing but wooden walls around me. It even has a kitchenette, but we chose to make this a driving foodie type trip instead! Almost 10 years ago to the day, we spent many months here for my husbands work. It was so cute and quaint but it’s something we never really appreciated until we were no longer around. Recently, I was looking back at an old album, and noticed a picture from a place we used to frequent. It was at that moment I brought up Airbnb, (after having an exceptional experience in October! In case you missed that post, check it out here!), searching for the perfect place that wouldn’t be too far away to revisit our old stomping grounds. I found this one pretty quickly and immediately booked it. I’m so glad I did. Nostalgia And Appreciating The Now During this trip, we drove around to the old sites we went to a decade ago, enjoyed some of the same meals, and stopped by our old place. We chatted a bunch, enjoyed each others company, and listened to old country music on the radio, (it’s all that was available!) However, there were some times as well when I wasn’t my best self. It’s always the times where I set my expectations too high and feel guilty about not being able to just “go with the flow,” something I’m trying to work a lot on these days. Instead of misunderstanding one another like we used to though, the hubs and I figured out what the issue was, talked through it, and moved on with our day. It made me even more grateful to be able to be with someone so understanding and patient. If you’re thinking this sounds too good to be true, don’t get me wrong. I think every relationship takes work, and that includes working on yourself…which is why it’s so important to me to understand myself better instead of solely focusing on external sources as I did in the past. Moving forward will always be harder than looking back. And I realized exactly that this was part of my problem this time. I had held on so tightly to our past, that I forgot about allowing time in for new memories and creating additional sparks on our timeline together. We’ve changed, individually and as a partnership. My advice to you this month is to allow that change. Let it in and absorb it all. Embrace and appreciate the now. Breathe new air into your lungs even if it’s from the same place you went to 10 years ago. Stop chasing what has been and start embracing what you’ve become. When you start living with less expectations, you can continue to create the next step in your journey. Related: Acknowledging Burnout & Learning Where To Find The Lightbulbs Thank You For Reading “Moving Ahead And Appreciating The Now” Thank you for reading today’s post about how I try to keep appreciating the now. What has your path to productivity looked like? Let me know what resonates with you. If you have a suggestion for what our next post should be let us know. Don’t forget to check out our sister site Rooted Drawers.
Path To Productivity: My Struggle With Planning And The Perfect Hot Cocoa Recipe
Ahhh. Planning for the year ahead. Seems so simple, doesn’t it? And yet somehow, each and every year, you’re most likely behind in some section of your life. I’m looking forward to next year to start planning less. I have a few reasons as to why. First, let’s look back at my path to productivity in 2023. Let’s talk about it. My Path In 2023 In January of 2023, I decided to take a full week off…of everything. I took downtime to an all time high, and reset myself both mentally and physically. Because of that, Habitual Balance was born. Through different twists and turns during the year, it developed into what you see today. The kind of mental space that you open up when you really give yourself a chance to think is utterly amazing. It’s as if that’s really how we should be doing things all along. When I finally allowed myself to have some brain space to dedicate back to my own life, all these new ideas and helpful thoughts started flowing in. It took going to the hospital to figure this out for me, so I’m hopeful that Habitual Balance being in your life will help you to do the same before it gets to that point. Planning is helpful for certain situations, but at times, it can quite literally cause a mental overload. Why do we overplan, overthink, and overdo everything as adults? As children, this isn’t so common. Multi-tasking usually isn’t even a thing. As kids we speak our mind, complete our tasks, and play as if there were no tomorrow. How is this chill mode of life so easily lost upon adults? Related: Habitual Growth: Looking Back And Moving Forward Time Goes By So Slowly… And Quickly I’ve got a hunch, you see. As we age, time becomes less available. The summers seem shorter, the winters longer, and the days at our jobs more monotonous. It’s as if time stands still during the situations we hate most, and time flies by when we actually have a moment to ourselves. Even when we are alone, there are distractions. Dogs that need attention, kids that need to be fed, marriages that take hard work over taking time for yourself. We forget about self-care or that it’s even a thing! It’s thrown out the window…and we wonder why it’s so hard to climb our way back out of a rut. Being selfish about self-care is okay. It’s something that we need to do as adults. It’s something that needs to have time spent on it. Last year I thought that if I just planned out every single aspect of my life, that I’d be a-okay. As long as it was listed in my Google calendar, that task would get done. And it did! 9 times out of 10 all of those tasks would be completed…and every time it would be right before I hit another mini wall of burnout. Since we lack extra time in our 20s, 30s, and so on, we push our limits by trying to squeeze in every task that we can so that we’re able to have that one little bit of freedom on the weekends. Why not spread it out and plan less?? I’m A Planner – Do You Go With The Flow? If we organize our lives to fit into time blocks then we’ll never have time to just “go with the flow.” This is something I’ve been trying hard to work on for several years. As I get older, I realize time after time that “going with the flow” is just not something I’ve ever been very good at. Even though I used to tell myself that, I’m a hardcore planner underneath it all. Can you relate?? My goal for 2024 is to schedule less appointments, while also scheduling more time in between them. My goal is to enjoy and be fully present for my loved ones (and of course my pets), so that someday when they’re gone I don’t regret the time not spent together. And lastly, my goal is to embrace who I really am, who I feel down to my core, and not save face for those around me. I want to be my truest self, and I want you to be able to be as well. Who are you? I’m an overthinking, schedule planning, last minute procrastinating work from home wife. I enjoy time with my dogs over everything. Sitting by a fire indoors or outdoors no matter what time of the year. I relish the moments with my best friend and husband when we allow ourselves time to take epic trips that lead into even better hikes. Related: Working Through Self Expectations & Limitations 5 Self-Care Options To Consider These days, I really love being me. And I have no shame in feeling like I miss out on things. I’m trying more often to not be so hard on myself about missing deadlines, or completing the hundreds of tasks I lay out for the week. What are you doing to plan less this coming year? If you need some suggestions, here they are. Do less with the time you have instead of more. The path to productivity isn’t just about saving time. Plan only when things absolutely make sense to, and really challenge yourself to commit to more self-care, whatever that looks like for you. Although there are many, here’s just a few self-care options on your path to productivity that you may consider: Snuggle up in your favorite blanket and watch a movie (or three) Remember that when you wake up and feel like you need a day off, you probably do Enjoy a warm fire during this cooler season and some homemade hot cocoa (check the last section for my favorite recipe!) Take a long walk in the woods or through nature somewhere, alone or with your significant other and pups Try standing outside and breathing in the fresh air for 5
Habitual Growth: Looking Back And Moving Forward
Hey guys. If you’ve been along on our journey so far, you may have noticed that we skipped a week here at Habitual Balance. That’s because of a few things that we’ll walk through today. December is already several days in and it’s flying by faster than ever. Have you taken a moment in time to sit back and take in your surroundings? Your family? Your growth? What are you looking forward to next year? Let’s talk about these things and habitual growth, shall we? Defining Family and Family Growth Family first has always been something drilled into my head growing up, and it probably goes that way for a lot of you as well, I’m assuming. The fact of the matter is though, that family doesn’t always have to be blood. Maybe you found a friend that you grew up with that’s basically became your sister, or have you ever thought about the fact that our own spouses or significant others aren’t “blood-related?” It’s for the bees. December brings on a new journey, one that starts us on a track to really feel the pressure of the new year ahead, and notice from our reflections in November how far we’ve actually come. Are you ready to transition into the next month with new growth? Or do you still feel stuck in the past? Over the last week or so, I’ve been realizing that these members of my life don’t have to be from my family tree. I’ve taken more time to reflect on that and realize that whom I love spending the most time with might just be the persons that aren’t related to me at all. (Or maybe, they’re even not even human! …Speaking to my fellow pet lovers out there!) I’m not sure about you, but I’m one who has come along way in the personal growth category. I used to thrive on going out and socializing, only to realize that it was seriously depressing me and feeling comfy at home was where I’d much rather be. It’s not always easy to understand those feelings, let alone act on them. Where do you love being most? Who do you love being with the most? Is it a friend? A family member? Or perhaps your dog? Related: How Self Reflection Helps You Grow as a Person Time Goes Fast, Be Present Now Having lost one of my furbabies last year, I feel much more compelled to make more time with my dogs these days. One recently developed arthritis, while the other got diagnosed with a tick disease. It’s so hard for me to process still that these little munchkins are just full of love but only around us for a short period of time. Fair, no, but still this is the way of life. If I learned anything from losing him, it was one thing. To be more present. To really embrace every moment and take in the sunlight, the wind blowing, the leaves crinkling. But not just in nature. I’ve also made myself learn how to become more present in daily life revolving around work-related topics, and during family time as well. To sit down without a phone or laptop and to actually have real conversations. Recently I was told (not for the first time), that I am constantly on my computer. (Because duh, I love connecting with you guys!!) However, that comment made me realize that I was spiraling again. That I was doomed to go down the burnout path once more if I didn’t start to pick myself up from a work day and turn the dial to off mode. We all need a wake up call now and then, don’t we? Related: Looking Internally – Rediscovering Your Why & Why It’s So Important To Growth What Does Habitual Growth Look Like For You In 2024? What does your upcoming year look like? Are you flustered about this year still? Have you made amends or plans with friends or family? Or maybe you’ve made promises you already know you’ll have to break, which of course, causes our all too well known friend to arrive…anxiety. Anxiety is something I’ve become more aware of this year. It’s shown me more about myself and why I do certain things certain ways, or why I feel things differently than someone else may. How has anxiety impacted you this year? And what do you plan to do to offset it in the year to come? Maybe you’re realizing that a specific job needs to be changed, or maybe just someone in that job. Have you looked inside of your relationships lately and thought about what you could give more of, or maybe could receive rather?? Now is the time of the year to start resetting your timeline. Begin again with a new mindset and new ideas, because with each coming year we grow and develop into new individuals. We find homes in other hearts that maybe had been there all along, but just were not open yet. Do you have plans for the holidays? Or would you prefer to high-tail it to a beach instead? Depending on your answer, what could that help to tell you about your relationship with those around you? Let’s dive into these uncomfortable topics more in depth during December, and find out what you’re really striving to accomplish in 2024. Related: Lost and Found: Finding Yourself and Gaining Clarity In Life Thank you for reading “Habitual Growth: Looking Back And Moving Forward”! Thank you for reading today’s post about how to move through habitual growth! Let me know what resonates with you. If you have a suggestion for what our next post should be let us know. Don’t forget to check out our sister site Rooted Drawers.
Moving Through Self-Reflection To Get To Self-Acceptance
As we move further through the stages of self-reflection, we move nearer and nearer to the realm of self-acceptance. Accepting one’s self for what they are is one of the most difficult things to do, at least in my experience. Have you ever heard of “the fantasy self?” Or wondered why you’re pulled in several directions at times and need guidance in how to handle those moments? I’m here to tell you that you’re not the only one. We have all had these circumstances arise in our lives, and discovering how best to move through them has been one of my biggest personal challenges. I’d like to talk today about my own experiences, and about what we can do to understand them a little better or how to approach situations like these in the future. Keep The Memories, Lose The Stuff To get into this more personally, I have a short backstory to tell you. About a year ago, I began reading a book called, “Keep The Memories, Lose The Stuff,” by Matt Paxton. I picked it up again recently. This book immediately spoke to me as when I began flipping through the initial pages. It showed me that I wasn’t the only one to have to quickly clear out my loved ones’ clutter in the home. Ironically, I didn’t think of it as clutter at all. I saw it as a beautiful and full lifetime of memories, stacked atop one another, gathering dust and more stories. I noticed the tiny details of each picture saved. Every item that would hold no value for most, but that I remembered talking about and/or giving to this person as gifts during their birthdays or holidays. Then I remembered the conversation that we had about the jewelry box, the angel figurines, and most importantly to me, about the newspaper clipping that showed my beautiful grandmother in cute little pumps in the black and gray photo where her and her colleagues stood in their office way back when. It was these conversations, these memories while standing with her in that back room closet that I didn’t even realize were so important to me at the time, but that clearly my memory decided to absorb like a sponge, since I can remember it as though it were yesterday. Funny how your body collects information so intently without you even recognizing it during that event. Related: The Role of Self Reflection in Personal Growth Dealing With Abandonment During Self-Reflection I’m walking you through a portion of this story because it’s what prompted me to pick up this book in the first place. This woman left in her home 3 lifetimes of memories. The home contained all inanimate objects, clothing, expired food items and way too many knick knacks. She knew where all of those came from. She knew who got them for her, and when they were given or picked up. Then, all in one fell swoop, it was cleared out top to bottom in just two short days. If I said I was heartbroken, that would be an understatement. It was incredible to me how things mean so much less to others than they do to the original person. Especially if they had no meaning behind them that wasn’t in plain site. This book showed me that I was not alone in these feelings of abandonment, and that it was okay to accept my new reality…without her and without her things. It took a lot more time to process those two days mentally than it did physically to go through all of those things and make snap decisions about what to do with them. Hell, I’m still processing some of it still even today, several years later. It’s like my body kept those moments stored for when I needed them, and pulls them out whenever it’s most necessary. This is just one scenario of how we can move through our current pain and into the present, accepting our new situation and how to handle ourselves moving forward. Making the best of our current pain and processing it to the best of our ability is simply the best thing you can do. Move through, not around. Self-Acceptance And The Fantasy Self We touched on this topic slightly in the beginning of the month, you may recall. Self-acceptance is being okay with who you’ve become, or really, who you actually are and always have been, deep down. During our childhood, teen and young adult years, we’re continuously influenced by others and their perspectives on how we are. How we perceive ourselves is something most of don’t even get around to doing until we’re well into our adult years. Why?? My opinion on this is directly correlated with learning about “the fantasy self.” The fantasy self is exactly what it sounds like. It’s the way we look at ourself and how we’d like others to look at us. It’s the piece of us that wants different things, even though our truest form tells us we’re crazy for thinking it. Have you had an experience such as this? Where you know and are so positive that you’ll wear those fringe jackets and tight jeans, or maybe your previous collection of cowboy boots is what you think you really want to wear because they’ll look awesome with that jacket that’s collecting dust, only to put these all on, walk out the door and have immediate anxiety and regret? Related: How Self Reflection Helps You Grow as a Person How Are You Moving Through Self-Reflection To Get To Self-Acceptance? This situation may look different for you, as we all differ as individuals in our own journeys. But my assumption is that you have a scenario pretty similar. Maybe you bought a truck instead of an SUV. And since you justify needing the open bed space but then realize it’s a gas-guzzler and the covered back of an SUV would have been more than sufficient. Or, maybe you keep telling yourself that
How Self Reflection Helps You Grow as a Person
Last week we talked about finding our truest selves, and the week before that we spoke on using November as a month of self-reflection. That is what road we’ll be continuing down in this post, so if you’d like to dive into a little more about how we can keep growing despite changes that happen to us, stay tuned. Let’s look at how self reflection helps you grow as a person. Life Imitates Art, Art Imitates Life Although I try to keep themes for each month for these posts, at times I feel it’s just necessary to talk about the present. Ironically enough, the present directly correlates with a ton of self-reflection this week and knowing how to grow better in the future. Let’s talk about it. Growth is all about change…and my friends, change is hard. It is basically one of the hardest things in life to partake in, which is why so many of us seem to fall short of our goals and dreams. We have trouble pushing past the change and don’t always see the blossom coming full bloom on the flower in the Spring. The dark and drearier days seep into our souls, and alas, we get stuck. Our feet feel like cement, our heart attached where we get pushed and pulled into different directions all at once. Knowing your true self, knowing how to navigate your real feelings, those…those are the hardest of them all. Related: The Role of Self Reflection in Personal Growth Self Reflecting on Change When we face difficulties within our relationships, we find ways to point the finger, blame another, do nearly anything to spend all of our efforts by turning it away from ourselves. When the truth most of the time is that we are the ones that need changing. We are the ones that need to make a change. What change have you recently run into in your own life? The road that we all stumble down decides to twist and turn at times. It falls short of certain goals and reaches far past others than we could have imagined. It shows us doors that we never thought to open, and slams others closed in our face. Why does this occur? My theory is, is that we need these changes to happen to us to remain growing. When we don’t get challenged by our spouse, our family, our work-life, we tend to get bored, saddened, or get lonely and fall into ourselves too deeply. Only then do we find it even harder to get out. We melt into the easy flow of life, not realizing how quickly it passes by us, day in, day out, continually encapsulating us on an endless loop. Have you ever stopped to wonder if this loop can be broken? Can you create your own change?? Related: Lost and Found: Finding Yourself and Gaining Clarity In Life You Have to Ride the Waves of Life, My Friend This week showed me a lot of change, things that were all previously out of my control, but that I have since realized happened to me for a reason. (Something we just spoke about recently if you’ve been keeping up with these posts). These changes occurred both in my personal and professional life all at once. They showed me how to adjust, adapt, and grow (but only after uncomfortable conversations and changes that made me sad). However, therein lies the opportunity that all of us seek. I relate it to a sort of high. A coming down off a dreary, gray cloud, and setting foot onto a golden pathway to your next destination. I find a route that only opened up after the heartache of these changes left me. Don’t get me wrong, we are only all human after all. Which means I most certainly did my fair share of sulking, napping, shopping, eating, and binging YouTube shorts. The truth is that life is a rollercoaster, and you have to simply learn to ride the waves of life, my friend. Whether that includes creating new challenges for yourself, writing out your next goals and ambitions, drawing up a new vision board, or just writing down your newly formed habits everyday to stay accountable. I believe in you, and I have faith that you can conquer whatever difficult road you may currently be on, because I’m right there with you on the same exact journey. Relax, Recover, Reflect Not long ago I had a conversation with a friend. We talked about how cycles of life can affect the cycles of our daily feelings, activities, and decision making. It’s something I’d never considered before. How dare we stop grinding because the weather changed. How dare we let up on our hobbies or sports for a week or two when that time of the month comes. Have you ever considered that Mother Earth herself takes her own natural breaks? Think about it. How much time have you spent in the outdoors just, being? Have you taken a breath of fresh air as the cool, fall wind passes by? Have you checked out the changing, dying leaves around you and realized that this too, is their season to rest and reset? Change is happening everywhere around us. Perhaps we should start letting it happen for us, as well? Take a breather today. Schedule time in your calendar if you must. Relax, recover, and reflect. We are all a part the universe, maybe we should start behaving like it…and realizing the change that happens to us, is just showing us that the best really is yet to come. Related: Working Through Self Expectations & Limitations Thank you for reading “How Self Reflection Helps You Grow as a Person”! Thank you for reading today’s post about how self reflection helps you grow as a person! Let me know what resonates with you. If you have a suggestion for what our next post should be let us know. Don’t forget to check out our sister site Rooted
Lost and Found: Finding Yourself and Gaining Clarity In Life
We started out November with some self-reflecting and observations. These observations could have been of yourself, of your loved ones, or maybe even of your so-called friends. Those things tend to change drastically over the years, and although we ebb and flow through them, there are some things that never change. My advice is to not get caught being one of them. Let’s take a look at finding yourself and gaining clarity in life through my story. Finding Yourself and Gaining Clarity Starts as a Child As we grow up and find our way as small children and then teens into young adults, we find a bunch of friends along the way that “have our back.” We find relationships and lovers with whom we think may last a lifetime, but perhaps may only be in our lives for a season. How is it that we remain blind to some things along this journey? And better yet, how is it that we can remain free of that blindness? During our formative years, some things set in, leaving us the fondest memories (and expectations) of how things “should” be in the future events to come. We find ourselves holding higher and higher hopes about what our friends and loved ones should be doing, while really, we should be focusing on the growth and changes that we ourselves have been making along the way. How do we overcome these obstacles during our youth, so that we can better navigate the realms of adulthood during the years where we’ll be challenged the most as an individual? How do we find who we really are without having to go through finding who we actually aren’t? Finding Out Who I Am The hard and real truth is however, that we simply don’t. Of course we all differ in our human experiences, and we may go through different truths of our own throughout life, but in my own personal journey, I’ve found that finding out who I actually wasn’t time and time again, has truly proved to myself now at 32 years of age who I actually am. I’m a writer, a better listener, a dog lover and adopter, a wife and a daughter. I’m also an entrepreneur, a fun-seeker, a (semi-adventurous) thrill-finder, beginner rock climber, moderately experienced hiker, semi-understanding gardener, and a lover of all things nature. I relish the days like this one where I get to enjoy my birthday in an off-grid location at a teeny tiny cabin settled into the autumn colored fall woods. I hiked in the rain with my husband and dogs, enjoyed meals cooked on a propane stove looking out into the trees, and walked down into the nearby creek to enjoy my morning tea. These are truly the moments that I love to fully immerse myself in. Related: Why I Chose Courage & It’s Endless Reservations Looking to the Past to Grow in the Future 3 years ago, 5 or even 10, I would have made the Mr. Yuck sticker face towards a day like today. You see, I’ve always loved things like this deep down, but for some reason it’s taken me until now to realize that birthdays can be anything you want them to be, and they don’t always need to be spent by pleasing everyone else. So often we spend our well-earned time off checking things online, ticking off tasks that others ask of us, or using our hard earned dough to spend on ourselves “because we deserve” whatever material thing it is that we’re longing for. If we would just simply offer more experiences to our physical being, perhaps our mental one would be in a much better state. Using Reflection When Finding Yourself and Gaining Clarity Reflection is about change. For years and decades I used to think that change was notoriously bad. If you changed, well then you must have gone to the dark side. Forgotten your truest self. Adjusted your ways for another. But as you reflect upon who you were this year, think about these things. Did you change something for the better? Or maybe for the worse, but can reel that in now and understand what needs done to adjust things moving forward? Perhaps you quit drinking, maybe you even made it to your 1 year sobriety coin. Or maybe you’ve decided to be a better listener to your partner to encourage a healthier and happier lifestyle as a partnership. Is it something that you’ve done for them…or for you? If you can help yourself by helping others, I don’t see that as being selfish in any way. Although, it’s okay to be selfish. It heals you internally when you do things that feel good to you. When’s the last time you had your favorite snack? (Without turning the TV on or scrolling through your latest YouTube shorts). Have you spent any time taking a relaxing bath or joining no one but your thoughts in the sauna? Look For Introspective Opportunities Being off-grid this weekend has been something I’ve been looking forward to for quite some time, and it’s perfectly suiting my feelings as well. We all live in a hyper-active and overworked lifestyle in 2023, and so I’m shooting for a little more slow down as we roll into 2024. My challenge to you this month is to really look inward and find what it is you have been searching for. Is it freedom from something, from someone? Is it finding a way to improve your own well-being to create a better you for the long run? Whatever it may be, just get started. Start reflecting more and taking a moment to pause and truly absorb whatever it is you’re doing. Enjoy life, by really living it to the fullest the best way you know how. Thank you for reading “Lost and Found: Finding Yourself and Gaining Clarity in Life”! Thank you for reading today’s post about finding yourself and gaining clarity! Let me know what resonates
The Role of Self Reflection in Personal Growth
Ahh, November. The month where we get to really look back over our year and reflect on who’ve we become and how we’d live next year differently. The time where we can start to slow down and grow from the lessons we’ve learned during the last 11 months. How do you live your life during the ending of the Fall season? Do you slow down at all or is this actually your busy season? I’d like to share with you today what mine looks like, and how slowing down and becoming more intentional with your time each day can help you to become more present in all things you do. Let’s look at the role of self reflection in personal growth. Self Reflection and Personal Growth in 2023 I’d like to start by saying that this has by far been one of the most difficult years of my life. I’ve faced a lot of challenges both personally and professionally and together they’ve taken a large toll on my physical and mental health. (Which is what prompted me to begin creating this blog so that we could start to follow this journey together). Throughout the year I’ve managed to hold nearly 6 different jobs, while my own business went up and down like a rollercoaster because I wasn’t giving it the attention it actually needed. They say a business is like a baby, I would have to admit that I couldn’t agree more. I faced losing someone close to me, a few different health issues at only 31 years old, and multiple different battles with conversations in my family, but mostly in my own head. The whole talking myself through things was probably one of the biggest learning experiences I’ve had yet as an adult. My husband has been there every step of the way, supporting me when I needed it and pushing me when I didn’t want to keep going. I think it’s safe to say that having an accountability partner really makes a true difference, so although I recommend you work on yourself first and foremost, when you find that kind of accountability in whatever kind of relationship you desire, hold onto it. It’s gotten me a really long way this year. How Personal Growth Can Sneak Up On You Whether or not we like to admit it, we humans do this weird thing called obsessing over the most minute things and tasks. We tend to overthink and predetermine before we even do the actual thing we catch ourselves overthinking. Why is it that this happens to us over and over? Or maybe, it’s happening for us? I’ve started to learn a lot more over the last year or so about how having the right mindset can really project you into a totally different path. It’s taught me how becoming your “true self” can set you apart from the average joe. What is your true self? Have you found them yet? Before I started this blog, I was on a one-way path to burnout through and through. My body was sending me signals I didn’t even know existed, and my mind was throwing up all of the blinkers on the control board to try and show me it was time to shut it down. It was only then that I realized it was time to begin again, start over, and reset. Related: Looking Internally – Rediscovering Your Why & Why It’s So Important To Growth Finding Your True Self is a Full Time Job Anxiety is something that occurs in so many adults, and even kids, these days that it truly continues to blow my mind. It’s such a common occurance that it’s even joked about and severely misunderstood. Although during these changing times, it continues to gain more much needed light. During this past year, were you who you really wanted to be? Or were you a mere image of what others prescribed for you year after year of your youth? Have you had the chance to find yourself yet? …Have you even had the chance to try?? Attempting to find your true self is a full-time job in itself, let alone needing to find time around those moments to make time for your family, pets, day job, side hustle, housework, social gatherings, hobbies, and your physical health. And let me be the first one to tell you, ain’t nobody got time for that. Focus on Being in the Moment Recently I watched someone’s feelings unfold regarding a forgotten memory that to them, should have been a golden one. It was heartbreaking to watch as this person is very close to me. But at this point, I now know something that they unfortunately don’t. Through a lot of reading, self-reflection and understanding my true form, I’m beginning to learn a lot more about how others reflect their own selves. Dementia is something that runs in this persons family. So, of course this would be the first thing they had gotten worried about. It’s happening to me, they thought. And so it was. What you believe is what you become. But alas, that wasn’t the case at all. The problem (that persists with most individuals), is simply that we are not able to be fully present in our time. Time passes us by with no real acknowledgement. It goes so quickly that we don’t even understand how it really flows. We simply need to feel ourselves in the moment, each moment, relishing in each breath and each second that passes, to truly implant it in our memory bank. If we don’t, it will be lost. Related: Why I Chose Courage & It’s Endless Reservations Your Time for Personal Growth is Now Let’s take the month of November this year to do some real, raw reflection in who we truly are. Who have you become up until this point in your life? Did one year take precedence over another? Was there a direct point in your timeline that truly stood out